The capping ceremony has just finished. We sang "Nightingale song" and the "Nightingale pledge" standing with a lamp on hand. Somehow I felt OK in the day. But thesedays my feeling is a little sagging. Just feel so dry on anything. I want to feel much more happy in any sense but seems a bit tough for me. Strange feeling...seems helpless on my feeling. I hoped I may feel better by writing in English because when I speak in English I feel so free and free from the stress to follow the same as others like what they expect me to be a Japanese like Japanese.
Lord, show me the way how to make myself happier. I feel so useless in myself. I need help in somehow. Someone who can really share my deep down... like you. I thought I can feel happy by giving but sometimes it does not work. What I can do is...kneele down myself before you and just listen till you give me a word. Somewhat uplifting!
3 comments:
Many times when I have been looking forward to something for so long, and wanting it so much, when I get there I wonder to myself, "Why am I not happier?" I do this all the time. It makes me sad sometimes too. Achievements take so much energy and sometimes part of your soul. We should get to feel happy when we reach the end.
Thanx.Sometimes I wish I can feel numb but...I do appreciate your comment.Thank you.Arigato.
I have felt very sad like that before, and I know how difficult it is. It does not seem practical, but still it happens. I hope you are feeling better. Sometimes exercise, and writing down my feelings would help. God bless you maggie.
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